What Cindy had done without realizing it was what biblical communicators from King David to Jesus to the apostle Peter did all the time. Then she used a word picture - the right one for me - and I not only got it, but it also stopped me in my tracks and turned my heart a different direction. But even when she would end our conversations with tears, it didn’t emotionally move me. Cindy had said similar things using everyday words a hundred times before. I’m like that book holding open your door while you walk in and do all the things that are truly important to you. “And you’ve moved on to another semester. “But now we’re married.” She pointed to her wedding ring. I looked at the textbook in my hands, thankful I had something to look at besides her disappointed expression. To talk and act like I was important to your future.” When we were dating, you couldn’t wait to pick me up. It’s not important to you now.”Īnd then without waiting for my response, she added, “That book represents the way you’ve treated me ever since we got married. I was using it as a doorstop in my study.Ĭindy looked me in the eye. “And what’s happened to that book now that you’ve passed the course, now that you’re on to another semester?” Not just for a test, but because it might help you help someone someday.” “You were reading this book and taking notes on it almost every night? You really dug into it, trying to learn all that was there. “You know how last semester you were taking this class?” she asked.

“This is breakfast?” I said, barely concealing my contempt. “So what’s this?” I picked up the book off my plate. It was my thick Advanced Psychopathology textbook. One morning, after another night of frustration with each other, I walked into the kitchen and noticed a book on my breakfast plate. On that day, Cindy used a powerful communication tool, a word picture, to change my life … and our marriage. And I grew more and more angry and lonely.Īnd then the day came when things blew up - but in an amazing way. Cindy became more and more hurt and lonely.

We talked about how we needed to communicate with each other - all the time. That was the level of communication in our first year of marriage. She seemed convinced that I simply didn’t care about her or anything she had to say. I was convinced she was just emotional or intentionally not explaining what she meant.

Soon after, she wouldn’t go to any of my games. If it’s that big of a deal, you can talk to me on the way to the game about anything you want.”īut Cindy wouldn’t go to that game. “But not about what we need to talk about. “We don’t talk anymore!” shouted my wife, Cindy.

Iword picture